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The terrible twos are all your fault, apparently

by Kirsty Crowe (follow)
According to an article published in The Times- your toddler's tantrums are all your fault.

Behaviour expert, Gillian Bridge claims that the 'terrible twos' is an invention of modern day parents rather than a vital part of a child's development.

Long believed social development which is often associated with boundary pushing, defiant or unruly behaviour is, you guessed it - all your fault. Forget that there is a huge amount of cognitive development around the age of two to three and that this development is associated with increased independence, yet at the same time not enough emotional intelligence to be able to process the changes.

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The Terrible Twos are apparently of our own doing. The modern-day parents whose mantra is "I won't let the baby change me" is to blame according to Bridge. Parents who refuse to change the patterns of their behaviour, taking toddlers to social settings such as pubs, cinemas and even the grocery store are simply creating a rod for their own back.

How dare we try to complete a mundane household chore like buying food with our terribly behaved toddler.

Instead of blaming ourselves, heres what we can do to help those embarrassing situations where our toddler has a meltdown at the checkout, at the park or at the library.

STAY CALM - Your toddler's behaviour is coming from a place of heightened emotions, adding to that by losing your patience will only increase the fragile equilibrium.

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DISTRACT, DISTRACT, DISTRACT - If you can identify the cause of your toddlers tantrum attempt to redirect his or her attention.

IGNORE THE BEHAVIOUR - No, I don't mean ignore your child. Ignore the behaviour, remove them from the situation and wait until their emotions have calmed down. Then you will be able to provide emotional support to work through the situation.

BE AWARE - What outside factors could be causing this behaviour? Is it nap time? Are molars trying to push through?

And remember, when things appear dire, hold your head up high and look for the sympathetic eyes of another mother - I promise there will be someone close by who has lived through a thousand public tantrums and will walk every embarrassing step with you as drag your kicking and screaming toddler away.

Here's a link to the original article if you want to read in full.
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